{38 reflections }

Just kidding even I cannot come up with 38 reflections, but there is a few I wanted to write down, probably mostly for myself to remember for next time if I get pregnant again...

-I am feeling heavy, achy, and sort of.. okay, more like really, really - uncomfortable, and all the time. I wake up tired, because sleeping feels like a chore. I don't like the fact I can not bend in any direction or even hug Simon cause his head bounces off the giant ball between us, but any time I start feeling sorry for myself, when that thought of "man this is hard" appears, I sort of get angry with myself. Angry, that I am not cherishing it as I should, it is such a special time after all, such a freaking gift and a privilege, I should be more grateful for things like this. I mean we only do this so many times in life and it is magic, really, vericose veins and all.

{ when the lightest meets the heaviest }

I am hitting the unknown territory here, arriving at 37 weeks of pregnancy is something I have not done before, by now I would be holding Simon in my arms enjoying the 7.11" of his glory. I assume his brother is of similar size now, because I am feeling really, really heavy these days. At my last midwife appointment I was measuring a week ahead all the sudden, so it looks like we are working on something big over here.

I said it many times now that I used to be such a hard butt on not owning much of pregnancy gear, but from this point forward I just don't know how to do it anymore, it is all getting out of control and every angle of me has changed its shape by now. I call this integrated expansion. And for those last days or weeks of this really fine stretching to the limit, and testing one's skin elasticity to a see-through point of no return, one needs some comfort.

{ Hello }


But not the fulminating kind

Note that it is the first fact I want people to know about me strictly, because I am following my natural patterns of associations. So yes, I do course on occasion. I think there is a time and a  place for a good course word, sometimes Polish, sometimes English, context-wise permitting.

Why another blog?
There is about a billion unoriginal reasons why people do it and I am doing it for all of them, but hey, I have more, so here is another one, maybe you have not heared that one before. So, I really wanted a place for all the outtakes of the pictures I save on my camera roll, for reals. I usually obey the sacred, unspoken rule of Instagram not to spam and choose to post just one picture, but I keep all the outtakes and they haunt me at night. I just want them to be used, somewhere, thus I am keeping them for something, at  this point I am on a verge of spamming Instagram and that is just such a faux pas... so bear with me, I need a happy space to upload the pictures, and simply clean up my phone instead of saving them for God knows what. And then I always want to say so much, I just have words in my head that need a more solid outlet than a caption or w comment, so here is my resolve.